Apparently the tot in this story has some amazing regenerative abilities, a la Claire from NBC’s Heroes. With barely any bleeding, and a slight scar on her eyelid, she’s just fine, vision and all.
Now, my twist on the story is that every time I was dragged to church, I felt like sticking a screwdriver in my eye. I never had the balls to do it, but this kid? I’m impressed.
Another question; If one does not believe in god, do they still have to capitalize every reference to it? Him, He, God, His Lord Al Mighty, the Father, the Big Guy…etc…etc? I don’t ever remember reading in the “Yellow Book of English Rules” we had in our possession in the 8th grade (follow the Yellow Book rules! Follow the Yellow Book rules!) about having to ever use that kind of capitalization, but I only ever just skimmed the thing. I remember it having rules for pre-internet internet references. That was weird.
I miss the 8th grade. That was, um, 1990? Wow. The lottery was just introduced, and Doug Engel was getting his ass kicked by my friend Chuck Williams for being a prick. Those were the days.
2 comments:
I tried a lot of things to get out of going to church as a kid, but I never thought of actually causing myself physical harm. I don't think I could have hurt myself every single week for 18 years, though.
Thought I knew the answer as to why it is we capitalize all God/Jebus-related pronouns. But now I'm confused and unsure. And I don't have my AP Stylebook handy. Damn.
My favorite thing about church was youth group gatherings. We had this awesome director who'd tell us stories that youth group directors just aren't supposed to tell.
That, and to avoid being "in church" while at church, my best friend and I would be the ones in the nursery, watching the little kids, who were never younger than 3 or 4. It was as good as it could get.
I'm actually kind of missing it now.
Post a Comment