Flu? Bah.

There's gotta be a reason why "flu" is spelled with an "f" and a "u". Christ.

This time, it's been weird. Fluctuating temperatures, strange sleep patterns, crazy shivering...out of all the flu bugs I've had over the past 30 years, this one's been just odd.

I did vomit once, and even that wasn't bad. Not typical. Usually it's violent and in the middle I tyically make two offers. One to a god, and one to a devil. The one who makes it go away gets to do whatever they want with/to me. Nobody decides to step in and intervene, so I just suffer for a few days and get on with my life.

But this time it sucks. It's December 31st. And what's my chump ass doing for New Year's? Eating chicken broth and watching someone's ball drop. I might slam a beer, just for gits and shiggles.

On the bright side of things, I doubt I'll miss work at all. I hate missing work. I understand and completely comply with the fact that I'm probably contagious, and if they want to send me home, they can and should...but that doesn't mean I'm not going to show up. I'm not that asshole employee who goes home sick when his pubes scratch him the wrong way or when he gets an eyelash stuck between his eye and eyelid. No. I'm better than that!

Save the toddler, save the world.

Screwdriver head child.

Apparently the tot in this story has some amazing regenerative abilities, a la Claire from NBC’s Heroes. With barely any bleeding, and a slight scar on her eyelid, she’s just fine, vision and all.

Now, my twist on the story is that every time I was dragged to church, I felt like sticking a screwdriver in my eye. I never had the balls to do it, but this kid? I’m impressed.

Another question; If one does not believe in god, do they still have to capitalize every reference to it? Him, He, God, His Lord Al Mighty, the Father, the Big Guy…etc…etc? I don’t ever remember reading in the “Yellow Book of English Rules” we had in our possession in the 8^th grade (follow the Yellow Book rules! Follow the Yellow Book rules!) about having to ever use that kind of capitalization, but I only ever just skimmed the thing. I remember it having rules for pre-internet internet references. That was weird.

I miss the 8^th grade. That was, um, 1990? Wow. The lottery was just introduced, and Doug Engel was getting his ass kicked by my friend Chuck Williams for being a prick. Those were the days.

Down with the sickness.

I’m not sick. But I fear that I soon will be. Everybody at work has some form of the shit that monkey had in Outbreak, starring Dustin Hoffman.

Poor monkey.

Jawbreakers and T-shirts

Today I’m eating Jawbreakers that are no less than two years old, and I’m not ashamed of doing so. There’s so many foodstuffs out there that spoil within a much smaller timeframe than Jawbreakers, that I’m 100% confident that doubly wrapped candy spheres pose no immediate threat to my well-being. Now, tooth decay and the occasional bit tongue are always a possibility, but those are expected, provided that I choose to be careless about maintaining the cleanliness and safety of my mouth. I’m not too worried about being careless.

I’m retiring my Khan/Kirk design in the next few days and I’m trying to figure out what to make next. In the meantime I want to make a few more shirts and do a couple of prints, to sort of commemorate the retirement. I’m going to miss my first design, but I need to make more. MORE!